The Impatient One.
by Hanah Fadrigalan
* With this one, I’m just really having fun with the rhyming scheme. Obviously, this piece is about dating - and how sometimes men (and even women) get so impatient (hahaha) .. I started writing it as a song, but it failed so here’s my heart to you. I think it’s a bit cute. :D
How many dinner meals do we need to eat?
How many velvet cakes do we need to split?
How many movies do we still need to watch?
Before you would tell me, “Hey you’re a great catch!”
Im so tired of this whole dating game,
this whole waiting game,
cuz its a losing game.
How many secrets do we need to share?
A million more conversations before we become a pair
Im getting sick of losing battles in these little heart affairs,
Baby you’re just too much to handle, just too much to bear.
How many phone calls do I need to make?
A thousand more text messages that I need to send.
How many plane tickets do I need to book?
Before you can tell me “Darling, I am hooked.”
Im so tired of this losing game,
Cuz theyre all the same,
just different names.
MIDNIGHT RENDEZVOUS
(Haiku)
By Hanah Fadrigalan
I know a nice place
In Southern California -
Where fine flowers bloom
Meet me at midnight
Where the sea and the sky meet -
I will be waiting.
I wrote you a note
And tossed it in the ocean -
You will get it soon.
A memo rolled up,
A message in a bottle.
Saying “I love you”
The clock will strike twelve
And soon enough you’ll be here
Hand in hand, we’ll be.
The wind blows slowly,
The leaves shuffle quietly,
I see you coming.
“I received your note,
and I want to let you know
that I love you too.”
The two become one,
This is how the story ends
Pitch Black. Fade out. Fin.
** For those of you who are not familiar with haiku, they are 5-7-5 three liner syllabication.
Here’s my take on a haiku that tells a story.
LOVE PROGRESSION
(Imitation)
by Hanah Fadrigalan
** For my creative writing class, we were supposed to write something that is quite a similar style with another already published poem. The poem I chose is “Love Poem 1990” by Peter Meinke. For those who know me very well, this is also “guess the guy game” Lol.
When I was young and naïve,
I loved a boy who is only eighteen
A true artist in his own right,
Keeping a pencil by his side at all times.
He gave life to the non-living stick figures,
But soon enough the monster in him started to
Swallow him alive; he comes tumbling and swirling
Into oblivion along with his make-believe characters.
The so-called love was just a fantasy, a complete make-believe.
When my memorable teenage years passed,
I loved a guy whose love sparkled like a diamond on the rough
His heart was welcoming and he has a disposition
As pleasant as a brand new day.
His hands extend to the needy,
And gives it all out even if he is left with nothing.
But for every good thing, there is a counterpart
His true colors came out and his red, red heart
Turned into something so mysterious and dark –
The once gentle soul became so harsh, and his warm heart turned cold.
I walked away and never looked back – I kept walking ‘til my feet hurt.
When I grew older – wiser and smarter
I loved a man whose style is as fresh as the morning dew.
He has a smile that can wake up a dead corpse. His silence speaks of
So many tales that only we can both understand. His pair of eyes become double
So he could see much clearer. He has been in the moon and back – seen the misfortunes
Of love and life. His love is like a broken CD, it often skips out but nevertheless it plays.
And at night, I often fall asleep in his arms like a baby being cradled. Despite my newfound confidence, I woke up one morning finding myself alone in the world – just me and some birds chirping. It’s time to move on again.
When my hair is grey and my body is frail,
I loved a gentleman whose bones crackle from arthritis, with bad eyesight, and a sweet, tender smile. Old as he may be, the stories of his yesterday glows like a bright supernova in the sky. He took care of me — and in my deathbed, he hugged me tightly. In between the now and then, infatuation and indifference, passion and hate – I found myself in his love.
by Hanah Fadrigalan
* For my ladies who’s had enough.
I’ve been sitting here
for months and months,
while I watch you
do all your stunts.
Crossed legged,
and arms crossed,
I wasn’t thinking
of all the time lost.
While I tip tap my shoes,
I sometimes feel the blues,
as I sit and wait
for your gallantry.
But my friends
couldn’t quite agree
that you’re the one for me.
I put a blindfold over my eyes
and a guard over my heart,
but then I’ve realized
that not all hearts have counterparts.
That’s okay, come what may,
as they say, but I wont continue
to sit here and wait,
because the weight
of this heart is getting heavy,
and I’m becoming a little impatient.
I am counting one to ten,
And so, till then,
I’ll continue to walk away
there’s no more reason to stay.
From the bottom of my heart
and the sole of my Prada shoes,
I am putting my foot down.
by Hanah Fadrigalan
What’s a single girl to do? If you’re a girl who was “always-with-a-boyfriend” then the transition to being in a relationship to being single might be a quite challenging - but doable. I’m not gonna blabber on about so-and-so and about who-and-who .. all I want to share with you are the things that I’ve learned in my singlehood. My mother would always tell me that “time is everything, it’s something [I] can’t take back.” With this in my mind, I need to make sure that I’m investing my time and effort into the right people and the right things. I have to let go of whatever hurts. Instead, I must project my energy into something productive and something that feels good. After consulting the tender advices of some trusted wise people, I have learned that feeling miserable and alone is better than feeling miserable while in a relationship.
For the newly single person, it’s not easy. It’s not. Really. It’s something that you have to force yourself to do. It’s something that is unnatural - in the beginning, at least. Losing that ‘someone’ to text, call, email, say goodnight to, hang out with, dine out with, and do cute stuff with —is GONE. First and foremost, the thing to do is to ACCEPT that the person isn’t there anymore. Vavoom. Gone. Accept that it’s over. Gone. Accept that it cannot be - it’s not meant to happen. Gone. Get it? Gone.
Secondly, moving on doesn’t mean that you have to find a new romantic flame. Who made that rule anyway? Quite pathetic, if you’d ask me. Moving on means you don’t care anymore. You feel indifferent. You don’t feel anything. Here’s how you know you’ve moved on: imagine your former flame genuinely happy in the arms of someone else. How would you feel? If your answer is “I dont know”, then you might need to do some self-exploration and more heart toxin flushing. If your answer is “I dont care,” then congratulations because that feeling of genuine indifference is all that you need.
Focus on improving yourself. You have the remote control to your life, even your feelings - you will be alone sometimes, but don’t choose to be lonely. Stop being somber and enjoy the company of yourself. You might’ve been hurt many times before, but don’t let the mistakes of the past affect your future possibilities. Every broken relationship is a separate case - don’t assume that the next relationship will go burn down in flames the way the last one did. Learn from the past, but leave it behind.
Finally, after you’ve flushed out the toxins from your heart, fill your calendar with fun things to do! Now this is when you should take out your mental notebook and jot down some positively ‘time-wasting’ things that you can do to pass the time. This is my list, so if it doesn’t apply - or if you aren’t willing to do it, skip to the next number or make your own ‘get-over-it’ list. (Disclaimer: obviously, if you’re a guy, you wouldn’t want to follow my nail-polish-application advice, wouldn’t you now?)
1. Create a list of things to do, places to go to, food you wish you ate, activities you’d like to try, hobbies you want to pursue.
2. Keep a “black book” (or private blog, just beware of hackers!) - then list all the things that you’ve learned from the past. Sometimes, we need to be our own therapists because in a moment of high emotions, we forget what we’ve learned and we tend to think purely without using our logic. Don’t let your heart think for you if it’s still broken - because, that will only lead you to making bad (& broken) decisions.
3. Perfect the art of nail polish application. It will save you a lot of money. seriously.
4. Pamper yourself: Whether this means going to the nail/hair salon & spa OR doing a DIY home beauty ritual - do it, just do it. Not only you will feel beautiful, your mind will also feel more at ease.
5. Learn something new. (i.e. musical instrument, language, dance, etc.) I feel like when you learn something new, you upgrade yourself a little bit. You get a life 1-UP!
6. Travel, travel, travel: For every place I visit, there’s always one thing that I fall in love with- and no, I’m not talking about a person - what I mean is your connection and appreciation for nature, scenery, food, cultural vibe, hospitality of people, etc. So, go out and travel, even by yourself - and fall in love over and over and over!!
7. Enjoy the company of yourself. Eat alone. Treat yourself out. Do the things you’d want another person to do FOR YOU. After all, you are your own best friend. You are your own lover. You, my friend, deserves only the best and nothing less.
8. Revamp your wardrobe: sure, you don’t have anyone to impress with your super glam clothes - but hello?! - who says you’re allowed to look like a worn-out mop. Flip open that fashion magazine and get ideas. Let the inner pussycat doll (or whatever inner alter-ego you’ve got) shine.
9. Meet people and be friendly. A smile goes a long way, but don’t just seal your lips. Say hello. Say something. SOMETHING! Everyone is an interesting person no matter how boring they might look like. Everyone has a story, so learn to listen. Appreciate other people and the differences that you will have among them. (When you have a future beau, you will understand why accepting differences is important! So practice this trait while you’re still single.)
10. Appreciate the Little Things and the Little People in Your World. Never take anybody and anything for granted. My parents taught me how to be content in the small things and be gracious all the time. Focus on the things that you have, and not the void that you’re lacking. Be thankful for your job, for your friends, for your family; be thankful that you can still afford to eat, breathe and live. Be thankful that you still have a beating heart - it just means that you still have the capability to love again. As long as your little heart is still beating, you must have no fear in love.
..and the last advice? Use this solitary “singlified” moment to be closer to the one who taught you how to love first. No other than God Himself. Give back the glory to him because after all, He is the one who knows you more than you know yourself. When you let God be in control of your fabulous single life, He will get you ready and train you how to be ‘the perfect one’ - and when the time is right - God will grace you with the perfect one.
Sometimes, we are left with some mind-boggling questions — do you really like the person or is it just the “idea” of that person? Are you in love with him or are you in love with what he describes himself to be? These are some questions left unanswered in my mind, and sometimes I become truly impatient for some answers. I would always think that time would show me what I’m looking for, answer the questions I’ve been pondering about, and lead me to the brighter side of life. However, I realized that sometimes I should stop becoming a predestinarian and I should just take actions for the sake of myself. After all, I do deserve answers. I should stop lingering around waiting for the person to say something when I could ask it myself. After all, the only answers would be ‘yes’ and ‘no’ — how can a single word hurt me?
I need to get this dirt off my shoulder. STAT.
npr:
A visualization of the world’s oceans.
From NASA:
This visualization shows ocean surface currents around the world during the period from June 2005 through December 2007. The visualization does not include a narration or annotations; the goal was to use ocean flow data to create a simple, visceral experience.
(Source: fromageetalpinisme, via poptech)
